What a buzz!!!! Another 1,5 I am so in the groove and feeling strong. I was 100.5 kilos yesterdays weigh in - so close to being in the nineties I can taste it. This morning I was exactly 100 kilos WOO HOO
I so thank me and Mel and fellow Kiwi Transformers. What got me up and running and over the line was exercise. I committed ahead of time and set myself up to swim Friday night, take the dog for huge walk after the vets Saturday morning and meet fellow Kiwi 12wbt'ers on Sunday for a walk. I knew that after those three sessions I would feel strong and energized and it went according to plan. By the time Sunday morning came, I was so pumped that even though it was pouring with rain, I still went. I got soaked but w burnt 500 cals.
What Michelle says is just so true - If you plan ahead then you have a plan to go by and chances are you will stick to it because you have set your intention and got the small details right.
What I realized is that I have 10 weeks to go and even if I only lose 11 kilos over that 10 weeks, I will be in the 80's for the first time in over a decade. All I have to do is persevere and stick to the program. I can do that. I can and I will. I choose to keep going. I commit to keep going. I will get there. I can see myself enjoying Xmas and feeling strong and being healthier and slimmer. It is going to happen. And I just dont know why I didn't believe I couldn't do it before. Why did I think I didn't deserve it.
I am not sure what has changed but something fundamental and deep has shifted. I feel that it is time to step up and stop hiding from what could be and instead embrace what is. It is weird but powerful. I feel the strength and awesomeness of the potential of me and I am not sure why it frightened me in the past - but I admit it did.
I am sick of giving up on me and I deserve better from myself and I plan to live up to me - and that is the truth. What is the saying - nothing tastes as good as being in control feels.
I have no doubt there will be hiccups along the way. But who cares. Life gets in the way sometimes but there is a difference this time. I am over the wallowing and hiding and playing down who I could be.
Wow it feels amazing....and all i have had tonight is a cup of tea!!!!! I promise :)
Thursday, 22 September 2011
Wednesday, 14 September 2011
week one weigh in - DOWN 2 kgs
Yeh I have dropped some weight Woo Hoo
I am proud that I di d but boy do I make it hard for myself!!!!!
I do really connect with what Mish was saying in the Live Feed last night - every time you say no to the 'treat' you take back your power and it grows stronger and stronger each time. I was going YEH thats right. I started pulling myself together and I found I was internally cheering myself on!!! Each time I said no or did something positive I gave myself a little pat on the back and some positive chat. IT did help.
I may have lost 2 kgs but I have been a pig!!! At the end of the last round I was feeling good and strong and confident I could keep going. I was back in the nineties and rocking it. I then decided to err on the side of caution and wanted to keep myself accountable and I figured - hell girlfriend JFDI so I signed up next round... then bit by bit during the gap between the two, I started to slip. I figured I was having a break a rest between rounds and it wouldn't matter coz I knew I had an end point and would jump back on he health wagon. I was safe - the up and coming program would pul me back in line.
So a little slack... and a little slack over here...and my weight only jumped from 99.5 up to 101 and stayed there. ok I can deal with that - kept it steady... and then as preseason started agin instead of getting motivated and tightening up I went the opposite.
What was my mind doing ??? Quick hurry up - better feast before I cant... better cram another cheese and crackers in before I cant blah blah blah
then - Oh My God - how quickly does the guilt and self hatred merry go round start up again and the powerlessness and the doubts creep in. I could not believe myself.
Then corporate box at the World cup opening ceremony is an excuse to binge out at a work morning tea and then the wining and dining at the rugby. I mean what was I thinking!!!! Guess i wast really thinking just cramming food down!!!!
So next thing I jump on the scales Saturday morning [hadnt faced them for 2 weeks] and I ahd jumped to 104 kgs. I mean WHAT THE???
And I deserved every bit of it!!!!! every single gram
And now 4 days later - 1200 cals a day couple of workouts and jumped back down to 102
So yes I am proud I am back on track
Yes I am proud I dropped 2 kgs
but really I cant crow too loud
AND I am so glad I signed up for the next round instead of flying solo - guess I have a way to go before earning my pilots wings.
Cheers for now Go for it everyone and get on with it No more Excuses
I am proud that I di d but boy do I make it hard for myself!!!!!
I do really connect with what Mish was saying in the Live Feed last night - every time you say no to the 'treat' you take back your power and it grows stronger and stronger each time. I was going YEH thats right. I started pulling myself together and I found I was internally cheering myself on!!! Each time I said no or did something positive I gave myself a little pat on the back and some positive chat. IT did help.
I may have lost 2 kgs but I have been a pig!!! At the end of the last round I was feeling good and strong and confident I could keep going. I was back in the nineties and rocking it. I then decided to err on the side of caution and wanted to keep myself accountable and I figured - hell girlfriend JFDI so I signed up next round... then bit by bit during the gap between the two, I started to slip. I figured I was having a break a rest between rounds and it wouldn't matter coz I knew I had an end point and would jump back on he health wagon. I was safe - the up and coming program would pul me back in line.
So a little slack... and a little slack over here...and my weight only jumped from 99.5 up to 101 and stayed there. ok I can deal with that - kept it steady... and then as preseason started agin instead of getting motivated and tightening up I went the opposite.
What was my mind doing ??? Quick hurry up - better feast before I cant... better cram another cheese and crackers in before I cant blah blah blah
then - Oh My God - how quickly does the guilt and self hatred merry go round start up again and the powerlessness and the doubts creep in. I could not believe myself.
Then corporate box at the World cup opening ceremony is an excuse to binge out at a work morning tea and then the wining and dining at the rugby. I mean what was I thinking!!!! Guess i wast really thinking just cramming food down!!!!
So next thing I jump on the scales Saturday morning [hadnt faced them for 2 weeks] and I ahd jumped to 104 kgs. I mean WHAT THE???
And I deserved every bit of it!!!!! every single gram
And now 4 days later - 1200 cals a day couple of workouts and jumped back down to 102
So yes I am proud I am back on track
Yes I am proud I dropped 2 kgs
but really I cant crow too loud
AND I am so glad I signed up for the next round instead of flying solo - guess I have a way to go before earning my pilots wings.
Cheers for now Go for it everyone and get on with it No more Excuses
Saturday, 10 September 2011
Day before Day ONE
So tomorrow is kick off - I have done the shopping and a full veggie drawer and fruit bowl. I have organized my diary and planned some gym sessions. I am scared but excited and looking forward to reconnecting to my strong powerful decisive in control woman of the world :)
Had planned to meet some Kiwi Transformers for a 9 am session but just didn't get there. The whole family slept in, even my daughter who has swimming training at 8.30 am, and the dog!!! We all woke up at 8.45 to the sound of the rain and wind and big storm outside. Sorry I did not just JFDI!!! And I can't use my twisted back from yesterday as an excuse as it seems much better today. So to pay penance I have demolished my daughters room, moved all the furniture away for the walls and vacuumed and scrubbed the walls and skirting boards and moved it all back again. Phew!!!!
I just have to dig deep and JFDI - I want the results and I know that I will feel so much better in a very short while. LAst round I starting feel physically stronger and lighter and healthier. And, more importantly, I started to get back in touch with my self respect and inner power - and that is what I miss the most.
So I now commit to getting myself back into mode and JFDI
Look out world here I come :)
Had planned to meet some Kiwi Transformers for a 9 am session but just didn't get there. The whole family slept in, even my daughter who has swimming training at 8.30 am, and the dog!!! We all woke up at 8.45 to the sound of the rain and wind and big storm outside. Sorry I did not just JFDI!!! And I can't use my twisted back from yesterday as an excuse as it seems much better today. So to pay penance I have demolished my daughters room, moved all the furniture away for the walls and vacuumed and scrubbed the walls and skirting boards and moved it all back again. Phew!!!!
I just have to dig deep and JFDI - I want the results and I know that I will feel so much better in a very short while. LAst round I starting feel physically stronger and lighter and healthier. And, more importantly, I started to get back in touch with my self respect and inner power - and that is what I miss the most.
So I now commit to getting myself back into mode and JFDI
Look out world here I come :)
Friday, 9 September 2011
My very first BLOG and my first post
I have never done a blog before so I am a total newbie. I really enjoyed and learnt from the forums and blog posts last round of Michelle Bridges 12 week body transformation. I got some great results last round and went from 111 kgs down to 99.5 kgs. My foray into the 90's only lasted week and a half and then I was back up to the 100's - but only just!!! That is cool though - I made it down which I never thought I could achieve.
This round I want to rock - I want to blitz it to the 80's YES THE EIGHTIES!!!! And I totally believe IF I do the work I can get there. I really trust the program, love the recipes and Michelle is such an inspiration as well as al the amazing transformations you see. The concept and the maths are simple and the results speak for themselves.
To be honest, I have been really struggling during the break - actually not struggling to get back on board - just given up and totally slack the last few weeks - I cannot get my head back in the right spot. I have rewatched the videos et but I keep thinking not till next week, not till next week, motivation will kick back in AND it hasnt YET - I still have time for treats till then AAArrrggghh I feel crap but stuck.
And I get the lesson so strongly - I felt SO powerful when I was in control and making decisions aligned to my goals. I started to believe I could do it and I was doing it. Then the round was over and I stopped, bit by bit, to be as determined and focused - and then I got back into that nice comfortable familiar space.
Throw in a corporate box at the opening ceremony for the rugby and free wine and food - not going to miss that. Well now it is done and over. Got my shopping sorted myself out and gotta get back into it.
One big factor that will help me fight my demons is the Kiwi Transformers group - you ladies rock!!! We had a smaller group last round and it so tapered off as time went on - I kept posting and encouraging but we were too small and too scattered a group to really kick each others butts. At the same time I was watching all the Aussie groups get together and do group stuff. BUT this time we have a bigger group, the commitment is awesome and we have some organisers and active ladies who are ready to go for it. There is also some locals in Auckland. I think that will help inspire me at those low moments and I hope to do the same for them.
So I am set - I have my shoes, my gym membership, my heart rate monitor, my weeks shopping and tomorrow is the first Kiwi Transformers Sunday session at One Tree Hill so I am using that as a kick off to get moving and stepping out to the eighties.
Off we go and it is going to be an awesome ride.
This round I want to rock - I want to blitz it to the 80's YES THE EIGHTIES!!!! And I totally believe IF I do the work I can get there. I really trust the program, love the recipes and Michelle is such an inspiration as well as al the amazing transformations you see. The concept and the maths are simple and the results speak for themselves.
To be honest, I have been really struggling during the break - actually not struggling to get back on board - just given up and totally slack the last few weeks - I cannot get my head back in the right spot. I have rewatched the videos et but I keep thinking not till next week, not till next week, motivation will kick back in AND it hasnt YET - I still have time for treats till then AAArrrggghh I feel crap but stuck.
And I get the lesson so strongly - I felt SO powerful when I was in control and making decisions aligned to my goals. I started to believe I could do it and I was doing it. Then the round was over and I stopped, bit by bit, to be as determined and focused - and then I got back into that nice comfortable familiar space.
Throw in a corporate box at the opening ceremony for the rugby and free wine and food - not going to miss that. Well now it is done and over. Got my shopping sorted myself out and gotta get back into it.
One big factor that will help me fight my demons is the Kiwi Transformers group - you ladies rock!!! We had a smaller group last round and it so tapered off as time went on - I kept posting and encouraging but we were too small and too scattered a group to really kick each others butts. At the same time I was watching all the Aussie groups get together and do group stuff. BUT this time we have a bigger group, the commitment is awesome and we have some organisers and active ladies who are ready to go for it. There is also some locals in Auckland. I think that will help inspire me at those low moments and I hope to do the same for them.
So I am set - I have my shoes, my gym membership, my heart rate monitor, my weeks shopping and tomorrow is the first Kiwi Transformers Sunday session at One Tree Hill so I am using that as a kick off to get moving and stepping out to the eighties.
Off we go and it is going to be an awesome ride.
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